'The art of being fucked is to fuck like it is an art."

two people.
two worlds.
two minds.
two lives.
brought together for one night.

They were virtually strangers just a a few days before.
If it weren't for their misfortune for the elevator they were riding to get stuck they would have never have met.
Nor be able to share this moment with one another.

Cotton.
Denim.
Clothing.
Torn.
Falling to the floor.
Heat of the moment.
Lips touch.
Tongue tips mingle sliding past one another
Colliding into one another clumsily.
Wet.
Hands touch.
Hands move to places rarely touched by others.
The want.
The need.
Touch.
Breath growing more ragged with each intake.
Pulse steadily increasing in rate.
Moan.
Grope.
Caress.
Flesh against flesh.
Riding.
Grinding.
Sexual frustration finally giving way.
Hand on breast.
Mouth wrapped around a mound of flesh.
Bite.
Nibble.
Suck.
Sweet nectar exchanged between the two.
Eyes locked.
Fire.
Desire.
Lust.
The Want.
The Need.
Flesh into flesh.
Thrust.
Gently and slow.
Grows.
Fast and rough.
Pleasure with the fine line of pain.
Rising.
falling.
Rise again.
Higher and higher.
Senses overloading.
Tensed muscles.
Looking over the top before the big drop.
Climax.

Clothes torn fixed and placed on its rightful place.
Final words.
Final looks.
Final goodbye.
Exit room.
Chance to look back?
No.
Never.
Ever.

One Night Stand

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High above where I belong looking down to a place I should never venture to
But under my skin I itch to visit and say hi.
I tell myself no repeatedly.
So far so good.
Last Stretch.
Setting: Night, Beach, Car with orange juice at my feet.
My mind is a battle ground.
Decisions. Decisions. Decisions.
Retract.
Fuck it.
I said it. Fuck.
The next thing I see and hear are my hand reaching and unzipping.
Fumbling with the plastic foil container. Pass one back.
Grabbed a cup and the orange juice which turns out to be Sunny Delight.
The car is moving now.
1,2,3,4
swallow.
5,6,7,8
gone.
All I can do is wait.

Good? Bad? Who knows.

Setting: Starbucks off of Palm and Saturn, Hookah, and a group of friends.
It is very clear that there were two distinguishable groups.
Only glass inbetween.

Lemon mint Hookah. First time.
Smoother than I expected.
With each hit that I took I began to relax more.
My head began to get lighter and my body began to grow a little heavier.
walk.
I can.

Setting: Parking lot, Cars, on Palm Ave. on the way home.
"Let's go to the car!" Gene says and walks away.
I follow.
In his car we sit there waiting for something but not knowing what soon music fills the empty space.
My ears ring and my body reacts to the heavy bass from the song.
Trance is the preference tonight.
I find myself in the car alone.
Sleepy.

Camille opens my door.
"Hey let's go to Lai's car."
"Okay."
I stand.
I giggle.
Can I walk?
Yes.

Tap. Tap.
huh?
Tap. Tap.
What the fuck.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
"Stop it Camille! Stop messing with me!!"
She laughs.
I laugh.

Lai's backseat.
Feeling kind of funny, good.
Driving.
Talking. Talking. Talking.
I can't stop talking.
Lai pokes me.
"huh?"
poke.
"HEEY!"
I see two figures very close together.
I can't stop myself so I ask,
"Are you guys kissing? KISS KISS KISS KISSY KISS!!"
I giggle uncontrollably.
Giggle fits.

Setting: Home.
I'm okay. I can walk.
Lai and Camille walk me to the door.
Dad opens the door.
Say bye.
I walk into the house and my dad asks me if I want to eat.
I say "No, I'll eat later." Not hungry.
"I need to take off my shoes."
Run up the stairs.
Head rush.
I giggle.

Setting: room
I forgot I went to the beach and that there's sand in the cuffs of my pants.
I fall to my bed sleepy.
I decide to call my cousin to tell him that I finally smoked hookah.
Just then I begin reaching my peak.
I begin to jabber.
Blah. Blah. Blah.
Hang up.
Call Stephanie my other cousin.
I'm on the phone with her during most of my peak.
There's sand on my bed now and I noticed.
Picture.
I'm on the phone while trying to clean the sand off my bed and constantly saying "OH MY GOD! There's sand all over my bed!"
I'm tripping balls like their no tomorrow.
Rolling in bed. Rolling in bed. Rolling in bed.
We're laughing on the phone.

I start calming down.
Computer.
I go to google... It's all black.
I freak out.
I restart the computer.
It's still black then I realize that it's earth day.
silly me.

finally sleep.
In a sandy bed.


Adventures are what I live for.

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Lately in the last what now... about month and week everyone that I knew who were in a relationship for a substantial amount of time are breaking up. And so far two of the girls have turned to me for help in their emotional roller coaster ride.

It's not that I don't want to help them or anything. It's just that it gets repetitive and they already know the answers to their questions but they're just in denial. See what love does to us? It turns us all into babbling fools.

Out of the two girls I only have to take care of one really really closely and almost sugar coat everything I say to her. I don't mind it really and I know that she's really hurt and everything but I wish the guy would at least be considerate and not be such a jerk. I don't want to give him a heads up that he's messing with her because I don't want to be in the middle of whatever is going on there. I'm tired of being in the middle of the relationships that I'm not even in. I learned my lesson the hard way.

Thankfully I don't have to take care of the other one. She's a big girl and the guy is a jerk-off and should fall down and realize what an idiot he is.

Both of these girls deserve better treatment from guys... Hell!! Everyone needs to seriously get over their egos and treat one another better... We only have one life people... Don't live it the way you'd regret it.

That's one of the many reasons why I'm a Lesbian. lmao... >.<

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i'm offically obsessed with The Material... they just amaze me every time...

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A lot has happened...

that girl doesn't talk to me anymore..

and i've gone to two shows over the break and i plan on going to more this year. including warped tour. wooo

This year is a year for music for me. new discoveries and rediscoveries of great bands.

a great band that i rediscovered is The Material... you might have heard of them if you were watching MTV2 dew circuit breakout in the last few months. They were the band with the girl front [singer] but they got second place... to The Myriad [i think that's how you spell their name]
The Material is a local band to San Diego and i'm glad they are, because if they get big YAY! they'll be reppin' Sunny Daygo. lol

also another show i went to before the year ended was Shiny Toy Guns. That was a fun show but it cost me an arm... It was at the House of Blues downtown. Christine [not my ex] and i ate at Sammy's Woodfired Pizza and it's a nice little place right next to the garage entrance on the corner of 5th and F st. and they have cute waitresses too.. >.< lol at the shiny toy guns show there was this one guy who was dancing like he was at a club. it was interestingly funny to me. haha i couldn't stop laughing. but when the STG came on i went into my own world and danced the way the music swayed me. i had a lot of fun.

hmm... i don't know i just felt like blogging here for a change.. hahaha

stand up for you right to be yourself.

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my thoughts are killing me...

i seriously need to stop thinking soooo much...

i drive myself crazy.

and so does she.

AHH!! lol

well...

happy thanksgiving everyone... and... enjoy getting fat.

i need to slow down and smell the flowers.

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mood: Perplexed
listening to: The Question is How - The Action Design

I just got out of a long term relationship and now there's another girl that likes me. Which for me is a first because I don't think I've ever remember someone starting to like me and me having to play catch up to understand it all.

half of me is saying it's too soon...

the other half is saying go for it! Don't let this opportunity go past!

I'm torn in two. stuck in the middle between two strong voices.

I am a hopeless romantic.
My body craves to be near another
And my heart wants to give love.

My heart doesn't want to get hurt again
but my mind is wrapped around the idea of being held like toilet paper around the cardboard center.

I'm losing sleep and my appetite is waning.
I beat myself up.
I make myself look good.
I try.
I try to be myself.
and oddly enough,
it works.

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Linh and I are over.

broken up..

it was mutual at first but.. i don't know anymore.

write more later

and about my crazy weekend.

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